Words: Risqué Boutique
I am not sure whether it’s a side effect of testosterone, but some men (a small but significant percentage) think that they know everything there is to know about pleasing a woman. That internal encyclopaedia of love that they so often refer to is filled with errors and misinformation, which date back to ancient generations. All of this leaves us ladies reaching for the ‘goodie drawer’ and why wouldn’t we when the most common male faux pas are:
1. You think you know what she wants – ‘think’ is the operative word here. Again we’ll put it down to high levels of testosterone here, but men often make assumptions about what women want based on other women. But women are not created equal…especially down there… and no two women are completely alike. So let’s face it… it might be a tad inconvenient but you possibly won’t know all our ‘buttons’ until we get ‘busy’ a few times.
2. You think you have all she needs – wrong again. Some women simply cannot have an orgasm through finger or tongue stimulation alone; and aren’t we lucky that we can use the help of a vibrator to seal the deal? For a lot of men, this is way too confronting – it’s not an attack on your adequacy and it isn’t about you, it’s about her.
3. You think sex feels the same way for her as it does for you – this is probably the biggest and most damaging misconception. Some men tend to believe that when sex feels good for them, it must feel good for us. Deep thrusting is case in point.
4. You think you know how to navigate down under – you might know where our buttons are, but do you really know how to press them? One thing that the sexual revolution did not completely correct is the fact that not all women are able to orgasm from vaginal penetration. That’s right…so you may need to find out how to stimulate those sweet spots to drive satisfaction, but remember it is sensitive down there!
If you think the fella you are seeing shares one or more of the above ideologies, you are probably busy planning your escape. But wait a minute, haven’t you ever heard of the old saying that practice makes perfect? Don’t be such a hard critic – most of us are left to figure out the art of sex ourselves. Take the time to guide your guy around down there or introduce a vibrator or sex toy into the mix and show him how it is done. We bet he will be only too happy to watch and learn a lesson or two.